Rules for dating a southern woman

In fact, some of the best families in the South have not had money for generations.I would rather have my grandmothers teapot collection than a Gucci bag-and I want to work in the fashion business. When I explain different aspects of my life to them, I can see their minds going blank.

Many outsiders love the charm of the Southern belle. Her tailgate prep is more complex than Eisenhower's maneuvering at Normandy. She's going to monogram the ever-living crap out of everything you own. She's in nine weddings this year, serving punch at four, and invited to 11 more. And speaking of weddings, you had better remember where you buried the bourbon. There's no such thing as a "quick trip" anywhere because even Dallas is a small town. There are six kinds of punch, 11 chips and dips, and more sausage balls than you can shake a stick at. She also knows which out-of-the-way shacks have the best barbecue. Just because she talks slow doesn't means she's stupid. She'll see her fourth-grade teacher's nephew at the grocery store and spend a full half-hour listening to him describe his recent colonoscopy. And let's not even get started on her outfit — she's got to get a blowout, manicure, and wax before she can even start to consider that.5. She's never misses a service at the United Church of SEC Football, and is a fervent believer in her lord and savior, Bear Bryant. Sure, she's got a charming drawl, but she's also got a master's in biochemical engineering, sugar, and you'd be a fool to underestimate her.8. She's got about a thousand of them, most of which were favors from the aforementioned weddings.11.

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